this is NOT a new year’s resolution

this is NOT a new year’s resolution .

this is just me documenting for posterity.

i have never been “thin”. it’s genetics. my sibling is lean like my aunts on the paternal side while iam all warm and fuzzy in a layer of adipose like my aunts on the maternal side.

i have never been unhappy about the image staring back at me on the mirror. still so. as i said this isn’t about weight loss or looking thin.

though chubbier than my friends in school and college, i have never let it worry me because i was healthy and fit.

through a nerve compression issue on my left arm and having asthma, I was still for because I had the stamina to do whatever I wanted to in the given day. i ate what I wanted to, sang, danced and stayed up all night reading the books to still seize the day.

sure, as a female, it’s also about my hormones and age that slow my BMR down. “working from home” mostly since 2013 has been a major factor in my health and stamina taking a turn for the worse.

oh there’d be rebuttals galore about how others in similar or situations worse have handled things better but as I said this is about me and what works for me.

doesn’t help that I became much better at cooking and baking. the advent of food delivery corporation dint help.

through all the years, I never went on a diet. never starved myself.

through all the years, I never stopped exercising too. knowing that I couldn’t get to strength train like I wanted to, I kept myself active with group cardio session.

so why am I still at my heaviest?

a lifestyle mostly spent resting on my rear.

and iam not happy about it.

i don’t have the energy to do whatever i want to in a day.

i don’t have the stamina to push through work like i did

i don’t have clothes that fit me well anymore.

i don’t have the tummy that will starve to look good. ever. food is bae.

but iam making changes. changes that I hope will be lifestyle based than for just weight loss.

i plan to work out 5 days a week. like I do now.

i plan to cut out processed sugar for a month and switch to sugar free options.

i plan to eat whatever in moderation. 1 slice of cake instead of 3.

i plan to work towards having a better stamina and feeling fitter.